Sexy Soccer (DVD) newly tagged "comedy"

That's the best thing you'll be able to do with this movie, if you can call it that. Although the plot is credible--at least for a category III movie--the execution is limp, thanks to awful acting, extremely corny action, and extremely inane dialogue. No praise for the nudity either. The glaring problem the director had was finding females who could act and who were also willing to appear naked; apparently he didn't score too well. Of all the girls on the soccer team, only one appears unclothed and another appears topless. The rest of the girls on the team, including the well-endowed cuties on the cover art, show no skin at all.

Two additional females appear without clothes in this movie--nameless, nonacting fill-ins whose sole task is to do the obligatory cat III faked-sex scenes. In fact, the only nudity to be seen in the movie takes place during these "sex" scenes--the lamest, most unerotic simulated sex I've ever seen in a cat III movie. These long, dull sequences, redolent of cheap porn but without the explicitness, will quickly make you hit the fast-forward button and skip through the heavy-handed movements, poor camera angles, and tame side-view nudity.

Several scenes take place in a locker room, but not surprisingly the girls are either fully clothed or wrapped in large towels entirely covering their bodies. Talk about missed opportunities!

This was shot on video and is presented in full frame. Colors are pale and washed-out.

Bottom line: Look elsewhere, for this one neither entertains nor titillates. A complete waste. For engaging, romping fun in this genre, check out the far superior Girls Unbutton.

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